Changes

I wish this feeling could go on forever!!  It's kind of funny how part of me is a stressed out mess and the other part, the weight focus part, is doing pretty good.   So I should say I wish the way I feel with my weight focus area could go on forever.  I think that is progress?!   

Yesterday, was weigh in day.  I knew I had done pretty good for the week because I had tracked and hadn't gone too crazy with extras.   So I was down 1.2 lbs  YAY!   From here on out is the lowest "weight" I have been in over 25 years..  I know I've said that before, recently,  but it still amazes me!  I feel this "Hope" that this time I'm going to do this!!   I don't know something feels different.     

So I went to Target to buy a baby shower gift.  Decided to get a pair of black jeans.   Took a 14 and a 12 to the  try on room.....  Thought, "well, I should try the 12 on first and get that disappointment over quickly,  IT FIT  and the waist was actually a little big.   I might could have worn a 10...  OMG!!  I didn't have time to try the 10 on and I believe it would have been too tight but I bet I could have gotten it zipped!!  
 
I am so close to being in the 160's!!  I just can't even imagine.   For so so long I was over 200 ..  Most of my adult life has been spent somewhere around 204 - 215..  And then for the last probably 10 years between 194 & 200...     194 has been my body's happy place...  go figure....    So to think of being in the 160's or at my goal weight of around 140ish  is so much closer than it's ever been and hard to even imagine. 

I saw some old friends that I hadn't seen in probably 10 years and one of them said she had to do a double take!!   What a compliment!  Then just yesterday my husband said, "you really aren't much bigger than your mom now"!  (sorry mom, I hope that's a compliment to you and not an insult)   My mom is in the low 140's...

I know I am at one of those highs and I apologize if it seems I am over the top.   I've got to take advantage of this while I can.  I feel like I need this motivation to keep me going.   

I also know this is where you lose sight of the real focus and it becomes easy to focus on the outward appearance.  It's such a balance.  It's ok to be concerned with how you look and ok to enjoy food but I tend to take it to extremes and lose my focus of what it really is about.   That is obedience to the Lord in not letting "this" rule my life but letting Him rule my life. 

Thanks Joy and Josie and Kimberlyn(where are you,  I miss your posts so much) --  you guys give me so much encouragement!  I love to read your blogs.  I do believe this has been one of the differences this time for me.  WW meetings help but you guys help so much more!!   Please keep your daily stories up - they help so much!!